Illinois Pineapples

Why do I find so much humor at our local grocery store? I think it’s because they make it too easy!

I stopped by my local Highlander (Kroger) grocery store to pick up a few essential food items (that’s code for ice cream.) They’ve been pushing a locally grown message for a while now with posters and signs around the store. We’re in Northern Illinois and the store has stretched local to mean things like Michigan blueberries and Kentucky cucumbers. It’s within a long day’s drive, I guess. Continue reading Illinois Pineapples

Census form requires telling the future

Our 2010 census form arrived in the mail today but it’s impossible to fill it out according to the instructions. Why, you ask?

Well, today is March 16, 2010. The packet contains a letter dated March 15, 2010, which includes the following text in bold print: Please complete and mail back the enclosed census form today.

Okay, I guess I better get to it.

Question 1: How many people were living or staying in this house, apartment, or mobile home on April 1, 2010?

Hmmmm. There does not seem to be a blank to state that I don’t know how to tell the future. 🙂

What Makes Some People Bald?

We picked up an old book at a garage sale titled The Book of Wonders. It has a copyright of 1914 by Presbrey Syndicate, Inc. The description on the inside cover reads

“Gives plain and simple answers to the thousands of everyday questions that are asked and which all should be able to, but cannont answer.” 

It’s been the source of some good laughs. This is our favorite entry. It explains that baldness is caused by wearing hats, just as flowers die if you block them from getting enough air circulation. 🙂

What Makes Some People Bald?

Lazy Lawn Mowing

Sometimes a low-tech solution to automation is all that is needed to save a lot of work. Although I now use robotic lawn mowers, you might still enjoy the story of how I once turned my gas-powered walk-behind mower into a work-saving autonomous mower. My neighbors certainly found it amusing. (More on that later.)

This simple hack cut my mowing time to about a third of what it used to be. I’m not sure of the exact cost because most of the parts were scrounged. Even the mower was a $30 garage sale special. In total, I probably spent less than $50 for the whole project, including the mower.

Continue reading Lazy Lawn Mowing